coffee and your sex drive

Super Mario, the face of Nintendo recently reported that he uses coffee to keep things on the up and up between him and the Princess.

"Ima Super Mar-io, I am da best!"

Super Mario exclaimed after he revealed that he has been using coffee bean e to help him deal with his occasional bouts of erectile dysfunction. Recent research into coffee as revealed that people who drink more coffee are hornier than those who do not. This clinical study was performed both of geriatric lab animals as well as actual live senior citizens. Upon dissection, it was revealed that testosterone levels had increased after being injected with an official Starbucks espresso syringe. Field studies also indicate that granpas who drink coffee shag more grannies. This field study also lead to the development of the Grannysgettingiton.com.

"oh thank you Mario." Was the Princess' reaction after finding out that the famous monster stomping plumber was using coffee to help lil Mario stay erect.

Coffee related tooth decay

Tis the season to cash in on my dental benefits and get as much dental work as I can stand before the end of the year. So, I squeezed in a cleaning the other day and spent a morning getting my teeth washed with a high pressure water gun or something like that.

I should stuck to two cups of the Mogiana Maui Blend that i was testing out, but dentists make me nervous and I drank the whole giant load that I had made in my Chemex that morning. Something about the drone of the drill triggered something down there and I found myself running to the bathroom several times during the process.

This spurred me to ask the dental hygenist if coffee was bad for your teeth.

"NO" she said as she lowered her weilder's mask and climbed into my mouth.

"But," She continued, " It does cause bad breath, and stains your teeth."

With my mouth full of dentists and their blunt instruments, I could only roll my eyes in relief.

I was prepared to get dentures though