Sipping coffee, writing, and spooning

Here I am at 5:47 in the AM, sipping coffee: a El Salvador Siberian Estate Pacamara. It is pretty much what remains of a 12 ounce batch that I roasted up in my Behmor last Wednesday and, like me, it has only gotten better with age.

At first, I was not really digging this Pacma from Siberia, not as much as the bourbon bean that came from the same farm last year, but I think that was because I was not letting it rest properly. This time, I still had some of that mistaken mexican left over, so the Siber-Pac had to sit a few days.

Being able to rest a few days is a rare feat for a coffee in the hands of a serious addict like me. Most roasts do not make it past day three of four (unless they really sucked), but this one made it almost a full week. And here it is tasting its best on day 6.

This gives me something to think about.

This ends my little morning writing session.

Now it is time for spooning.

Doesn't that feel nice?

Pirhanas meet Mexico

I'm sitting here sipping on some rather cool and a bit watered down mislabeled Mexico Organic Terruno Nayarita from my Sweet Maria's stash and thinking about the movie Pirhana 3D and its chances of winning an Oscar for best picture. I cannot believe no one is taking this picture seriously, I thought it was a gleefulyl glorious masterpiece.

The Nayarita that I am drinking as I ponder was sent to me in the guise FTO Chiapas-Reserve El Truifino due some apparent mishap at the company's Oakland based warehouse. I hope no one got hurt. They sent me a e-mail notifying me of the egregious error that they made in sending me the wrong organic mexican green coffee beans and have even offered to send me a bag of the Chiapas Reserve beans free of charge. I knew something was up with these beans so I am glad SM sent me a message to clear things up. I remember tasting this coffee which I roasted in my Behmor at P1 until deep into the second crack and thinking " now these are definitely not from the Chiapas reserve".

Yeah right, if only I was that big of a coffee nerd to now the difference.

Someday perhaps

Back to Pirhana 3D.

This movies seriously kicked some major ass. It had babes, boobs and booty all in 3D, it had buckets of blood, a severed penis, and some of the funniest deaths ever filmed. It was also clever in that dead pan wink, wink nudge nudge sort of way that made it a joy to watch. Yet despite the glowing reviews from would be critics like me, the movie seems destined for early video release. Hopefully then it will find the audience and acclaim that it deserves.

Now back to Mexican Coffee

Since I like the Nayarita and I am not a big enough coffee nerd to think that the folks over at Sweet maria's duped me into drinking the wrong organic Mexican coffee, i feel a bit guilty in making them ship me a free bag of the other Mexican coffee that I had originally selected when I was browsing their site. However, the cheap Yooper in me finds it hard not to take them up on their free bag.

Now back to the movie

So what if the cameraman played by the one guy from The Daily Show just disappears without an explanation, this movie is still at least twice as clever as Avatard. It might even give Inception a run for its money. Dream within a dream within a dream within yet another dream. Come on.

Okay, that might be going a bit too far. Inception is also a pretty damn good movie.

Bosty Beans

Causing restlessness, hyperactivity, snarling, barking, and jitters, Coffee Beans should not be a regular part of a Dog's diet.

If you think your dog has been eating any rogue coffee beans that do not make it from your stash to your roaster, keep a good eye on his poop.

You might find yourself with a golden goose. if people are willing to shell out hundreds of dollars for cat poop coffee. How much could I get for Bosty Beans I wonder?

holy Fuck, has it been that long?

Sitting Here , sipping on some Costa Rica Chirripo Finca Alaska that I roasted last Thurs. I had originally bought it because it happened to have Alaska in its name along with a somewhat decent review by Tom at SM, and it has gone on to be one of the standout beans of the summer. It has a real smooth taste out of both the Chemex and Smart Drip Brewers. Chalk butter chocolate with a hint of grapenuts. I need to be sure to stock up on some of this one before it disappears from Sweet Maria's Warehouse. This was what already happened to some Kenyas I really like this past spring, not to mention the Tanzanian Blackburn Estate from last year. As soon as I discovered them, the suckers were already gone from the shelves.

Not that I want to over do it either

Like I did last summer when I bought ten freaking pounds of the Brazilian Mogiana, only to get sick of it by mid winter. I finally ended up finishing it off this spring when I was too broke to do any more big coffee purchases.

Hey What the Fuck?

So its just like that huh? You go away for 6 months leaving behind nothing but a shitty blog on how much you hated Avatard, and then you come back with a casual blog about some fucking coffee like you have been posting everyday?

Where the hell have you been?

Oh, um hey there coffeeporn... yeah sorry about that. It is just that with moving, getting a dog and trying to focus on my writing career, I did not have any time too post anything new. Also, haven't found the time to totally keep up with my obsession. Heck, I have even found myself buying some beans from Peets a couple of times because I could not find the time to roast some up.

Well shit brother, you need to make time for Coffeeporn! I remember when we was tight. when something showed up on me every other day.

I know, I know. Hey, I am sorry. I will try to make some time. I mean, listen I will do my best to come up with some new stories for you that involve my favorite subjects of both coffee and porn. I promise.

I mean, I am not askin for a full on serious relationship, just throw me a few bones once in a while.

I promise I will.

AVATARD3D

Okay, So curiosity finally got the best of me....

With all of its Box Office Records and its shoe in as the Academy Award Winner (Yes it will win), I finally took out a small business loan and went to the movies to get all AVATARD3D in here.

Me and the GF had been resisting the James "king of the world" Cameron feature, finding the previews of poorly drawn blue people flying around on Pterodactyls just not our cup of coffee despite the promises of multiple orgasms via totally awesome 3d imagery.

I already knew Cameron to be bit of a one story line type of director ( see Kevin Costner) and figured the movie would be rife with horrible dialog, over simplified relationships between the characters, and awesome action sequences featuring aliens or robots, or both. Yet, most people that I talked to said it was worth the 15 bucks and and the cool graphics more than made up for the crap filled plot and dialog.

So anyways, we battled the wind and the rain, paid our small fortune, got our 3d shades and got ready to witness the juggernaut that is Avatar.

Waterlogged

"Well, that wasn't too awful," I said to myself at the urinal immediately following the movie. I think, however, that I was referring to the Cameron pee curse more than the movie. This curse last struck me 13 years ago during the premier of Titanic, where my desperate need to urinate totally ruined the whole sinking of the boat and the drowning of Leo. I still shudder when I think about the damage probably done to my kidneys that night. This time, I was smart enough to tinkle before the movie started, and sipped my coffee sparingly. The sprinkles still came just when the fight between the blue indians and white guys was really heating up, but I was able to hold on comfortably enough until the end credits.

Still, it wasn't too bad...

Okay, i must admit that the movie was not that bad. The 3d shit was pretty cool even if my fucking 3d glasses kept slipping off my own glasses (they really should make 3d goggle for people with glasses) . When I did get the glasses to sit right, the imagery was rich and actually popped out at you. I really liked how they got all the little pieces of crap to float around, making you feel like you were right in the midst of the action as the mean capitalists blew the crap out of the blue people ewok inspired tree home.

I also need to admit that the lithe blue chick kind of turned me on. With those high perky breasts and exposed midriff along with the sexy little cat tail, I can see why the hero wanted to take a little dip into the alien honey pot. Perhaps its a statement of my own weird kinks, but I will not be surprised when bootlegged 3d Na'Vi porn starts showing up in places I like to occasionally visit.

As time goes by...

However, the more I dwell on it, the more I just cannot get past all the negative aspects of this movie. Here is my list of the things I disliked...

1. The Cost
2. The Avatarded Plot
3. The Avatarded Dialog
4. The creepy smile that Sigourney Weaver's Avatar had
5. The story by committee way the world of Pandora was built
6. Unobtainium

While you can appreciate the effort Cameron put in to planning the world of Pandora down to the last floating tree spore, having input from so many experts on how an alien world should look, and how alien people should talk makes Pandora a bit discombobulated. It might have been better if only one visionary had a hand in its creation. The plot itself is a rip off of Dances with Wolves and the dialog is more awkward then getting stuck in a elevator with old Japanese Couple. If it was not for the cool graphics and the James Cameron stamp, this movie would be destined for the scrap heap.

brisco horseshoe tiberius cates erickson

Beany's hurting

Poor Beany,

She is not looking to hot right now. Like she has just spent the last month snorting crystal meth and getting dp'ed by a pack Frat Boys. Her leaves are all droopy, brown and wrinkled, as if they belong in a 1970's era National Geographic magazine. Even her new growth is looking like crap.

I don't know what I did wrong...

She might have gotten cold, or perhaps the low humidity of the very un tropical bay area is fucking with her look. I tried taking a shower with her last night, letting her soak up the steamy heat as I washed my hair, scrubbed my back and touched myself as I cried gently beneath the steaming cascade of water that washed away my sticky tears.

This performance did nothing for her.

Perhaps it is more than just the cold dry winter...

There was that incident with the heater that damaged her on one side, forcing me to give her a little trim. After the trim, she seemed a bit lopsided, so I did a bit more trimming. All this cutting might of shocked her. I also may have been sprinkling her with too much of my self made fertilizer water (not a sexual innuendo, but a reference to bong water). I might of threw her PH off, and not I need to get her the plant equivalent of Vagisil. It also might be some sort of fungus.

It might be because, like OBGYN's during the Bush Administration, I might have "practiced my love" on beany a bit too much this winter. I have been giving her a lot of love in the form of steady light and waterings. Perhaps I need to lay off a bit and she will spring back.